The reality is no one is perfectly pleased with himself or herself each and every day. Everyone has insecurities, and sometimes, these negative feelings can lead to self-loathing. We may believe we are less strong, confident and attractive and that others are enjoying more wonderful lives. But there are ways to quiet those insistent little voices in our heads that cause us to doubt our value as human beings.
Many mental health experts agree that valuing ourselves begins with self-acceptance. This ability to accept all aspects of who we are is the first step on the road to unconditional self-love. We arrive at this destination when we’re aware of our weaknesses and limitations but still “fully accept ourselves,” says Leon F. Seltzer, PhD, a clinical psychologist and the author of Paradoxical Strategies in Psychotherapy.
The path to self-acceptance lies in becoming less judgmental of who we are and what our abilities entail, Seltzer says. Constant self-judgment can lead us to compare ourselves with others and perpetuate the feeling that we have less value.
When these feelings threaten to overwhelm us, perhaps it might be helpful to remember a quote credited to Malcolm Forbes, an American entrepreneur and the publisher of Forbes magazine.
Said Forbes, “Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are.”