Q: Lately, the sex I’ve been having has been off the chain, but only when I use crystal meth or ecstasy. However, sometimes I can’t remember what I did the night before. I know this is risky, and I don’t want to get hooked. How can I keep the mind-blowing sex and nix the drugs?

A: It doesn’t surprise me that you feel sexually uninhibited when you take either of these drugs. Crystal meth and ecstasy stimulate areas of the brain that retain memories of excitement and euphoria, thereby increasing sexual pleasure. You may last longer sexually, but many people can’t recall what happened. How do you know you’ve been having great sex if you can’t remember what you did? I suspect you are mistaking your memories of sex with the high you would have experienced regardless.

You already know that you’re putting yourself at risk. Not only are both drugs highly addictive, but their growing popularity in the black community could cause a spike in HIV and STD infections  as it did in the gay community because users rarely use condoms. If you can’t remember what you did, you can’t be certain  you were safe.

Perhaps you’re using drugs to help you feel less inhibited about sex, but contrary to media images, there’s nothing wrong with being selective about our sexual experiences and partners. The best way to enjoy sex is to take time to develop a relationship with someone. When you are both ready, talk about the type of sex you want to have. The more you discuss beforehand, the more likely that  you will each get what you want. You may not feel as aroused as when you were high, but at least this time you’ll remember if it was good and if your partner was good to you. And isn’t that what sex is really about?

If you are struggling with meth or ecstasy, access recovery info at www.narconon.org.