Eight Tips on Taking advice
To commemorate my first anniversary of writing dating advice tips I thought it would be a good idea to give some tips on taking advice. I got the idea to write advice tips while watching and episode of Inside the Actor’s Studio where the guest was Eddie Murphy. A student asked Eddie what advice he would give to new actors? And he said “don’t ask anybody for advice.” Then he told a story about meeting Rodney Dangerfield and Mr. Dangerfield told him to stop cursing. Since Eddie continued to curse and blew up he felt Rodney’s advice was bad. Now I understand what he means but advice is one way people learn from other people. My mother used to say “A fool can learn from his own mistakes but it takes a wise man to learn from the mistakes of others.” The reason why I give advice is to share the good choices I’ve made and other good things I’ve learned so other people can avoid drama and life altering mistakes. One of my friends recently told me that people thought I was preaching to them and if they didn’t do what I was saying in my advice they were condemned. Well let me tell you I am not a preacher (which there is nothing wrong with being because people pack churches on Sundays to hear their advice) I just believe in what I say to people. That said making people feel like they are condemned to a negative results is not the feelings I want people to get from my advice. I think what happens a lot with me is that I am fearless with who I will confront and many of the people I talk to believe very strongly that what they are doing to men or women is not wrong. Many women feel that there is nothing wrong with drinking off a man’s tab (all night if he offers) a man which they do not like. Some guys feel there’s nothing wrong with the hit and run. The people who behave like this including a variety of similar activities do not feel they are doing anything wrong. There are songs about these heartless activities like Gwen Gutherage’s song Ain’t nothing going on but the rent. Or the line from James Brown’s Hot Pants son “Use what ya got to get what ya want.” I started my career as relationship advisor and instruction giver by taking on Players and Gold Diggers. My college tour is still titled Stop the Game. That’s why my posture is very strong and confrontational.
Now advice should never come off as an ultimatum. When people feel that way about my advice or most people’s advice it is usually because they are taking the advice the wrong way. So to help people take advice without feeling they are being judged here some tips for them.
1. Remember advice is only information on how other people have succeeded at what they are giving you information on.
2. There is more than one way to do most everything.3. When you go to school all you’re doing is taking advice from a professor who took advice from someone else. Even scientist use the scientific method to conduct their studies. The scientific method is only the way a certain group of scientists felt was the best way to do something.
4. Good advice is not limited to people with degrees or experts.
5. Most people don’t like to give advice. Either because they’re afraid of the returned judgment or they don’t know how to give it.
6. Don’t be embarrassed to ask for advice or listen to someone else’s advice.
7. Take in consideration the person’s bias who is giving you the advice.
8. Not everybody knows how to give advice. If you don’t like the advisor move on. Let them tell you what they want and then do what you want to do. Advice is not something you have to take it is only a suggestion.
I hope my tips made you think. I wanted to help bridge a gap between advice givers and people in need. I can’t reach everybody and many people receive good advice from their friends and family. They don’t always listen to them because they have a problem with people giving them advice. That is not good. Advice is really only people’s effort to help others. People don’t normally give advice to people they don’t like. So those were my tips on advice. If you have any comments please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org