Q: All my girlfriends talk about having intense orgasms during intercourse. I’ve had orgasms only with oral sex and my vibrator. Is there something wrong with me?

A: Nothing is wrong with you. Fifteen to 30 percent of all women have never had an orgasm through penetrative vaginal intercourse. Since you have achieved orgasms outside of intercourse, however, with the right techniques employed, you should be able to achieve release in this way.

What’s crucial:

  • Your partner must know your anatomy. Show your partner the location of all your hot spots. Ask that he or she touch and stimulate those areas.
  • Make sure your partner is energized or has a backup plan in case fatigue sets in. For some women, it can take a while for the body to reach an orgasm. Your chances increase the longer the two of you have sex.
  • Make sure you are in a loving and/or committed relationship with your partner. Sometimes if the relationship is disharmonious, your mind can block your ability to achieve orgasm.
  • You and your partner should get tested for HIV and STIs. Free your mind from worry in order to achieve release.


Learn more about sexual health at drrachael.com.