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Take Off the Mask!

by Kate Ferguson

Depression wears many faces in the African-American community. To treat it, however, the first steps are to recognize it for what it is and realize there is no shame or weakness in admitting you need help.

When 18-year-old Jordan Burnham leaned out the ninth-story window of his parents’ apartment last September, it felt as if he were looking at the only possible way out. In therapy for depression, Burnham was on medication for the problem. But the thoughts of “wanting to not be here” refused to go away. And so, on a slightly warmer than average evening in King of Prussia, Pennsylvania, the popular and well-liked high school athlete, who was just nominated to his school’s homecoming court, jumped.

Miraculously, he survived. The plunge, according to a news report, shattered his left leg, broke his pelvis and jaw and fractured his left wrist. Several months later, Burnham was sitting in a wheelchair sharing his story at a congressional briefing on the stigma of mental illness. He had decided to speak up about his condition, something he wasn’t able to do during his bout with depression. Back then, Burnham didn’t want to appear weak, so he masked his fears and kept silent—even though his very life depended on it.

Unfortunately, his pain and silence aren’t uncommon. The effects of depression on black men and the reluctance of the African-American community to address mental health issues are well documented. In 2001, then-U.S. surgeon general David Satcher released a Report on Mental Health supplement titled “Mental Health: Culture, Race & Ethnicity” that detailed the cause-and-effect relationship created by our silence and denial about depression. In John Head’s insightful book on the issue, Black Men and Depression: Saving Our Lives, Healing Our Families and Friends, the former health reporter (who also suffered from depression) explores reasons why. “…from the time we are young boys, black males have ingrained into us an idea of manhood that requires a silence about feelings, a withholding of emotion, an ability to bear burdens alone, and a refusal to appear weak. The internal pressure to adhere to this concept of masculinity only increases as we confront a society that historically has sought to deny us our manhood.”

The stresses that wounded Burnham’s spirit were mostly internal, leading to a state of mental exhaustion that drained him and robbed him of the will to live. “I actually never had suicidal thoughts. I had thoughts of wanting
to not be here because I was tired of being depressed,” Burnham explains. “I wouldn’t have minded dying, but I would never have taken my own life. I was shocked when I found out what I did. I couldn’t believe my depression had gotten that out of control.”

Burnham was diagnosed with depression after he’d failed his driver’s test and exhibited uncharacteristic anger about the matter. His mother had responded by taking him to a therapist who’d prescribed an antidepressant. Despite the treatment, however, Burnham continued struggling. “My outlook on any mental illness is that it can be easily treated with the correct medicine and therapy,” he says. “I believe that, in my case, there was a mistake in the dosage of medicine I was taking. It was way too little. Currently, I have a great doctor who is in control of my therapy and medicine. I recommend that because it’s helped me out a lot.”

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